Torn

Torn if i'm having PMS or simply bluer these days so i'm torn of putting down my thoughts, which are mostly on the darker shade which would just make me feel more spent, or just save it, and write it later as a book - i already asked a friend to make the book cover.

Torn between finding a work or sulking in the corner. Work for money and most of all to keep my mind occupied, but then i'm always torn between staying home and keeping an eye on my mother like a hawk or go out - how could i be functional at work like that.

On the brighter side kind of torn:

Torn among the restos in SM Consolacion, an attempt of Mark to let me get out and divert my attention to which I'm really thankful. It probably has not been easy for him but i'm too occupied to really care about the other people around me. Thinking about him and us, I don't know what kind of oddity we have not yet experienced. 

Torn between Myanmar and Vietnam. To make it less somber, i think of future trips, which may not necessarily be coming true. Vietnam for pho and coffee, but Bourdain's Myanmar feature showcased their interesting food and coffee culturw. 

Torn between Palawan and Baguio because going out of PH can be expensive. Baguio for the "diner" bucketlist. Palawan as an alternative for Vietnam. And just realized that I'd been to Palawan except that I have no beach photos that's why it felt I never been there.

Torn about getting a schooling on cargiving, nursing, PT/OT, and medicine. "Inspired" by my current situation, I'm kinda dead on becoming a specialist on "dying" industry. I have no prob studying for medicine but it just takes too long, nursing and caregiving can be so emotionally draining when caring for patients. So i'm Leaning on PT/OT because somehow there's a limit to the interaction/care i'd be providing. If all things fail, maybe a funeral parlor?

Owkei, i'm getting morbid. But weird that death, which is a very part of life, is always look at that way. 

John the Caterpillar by Mateo Buenconsejo Grade 2-Fortitude

(Following is the edited version by me. He loves the word "and.") 

John the Caterpillar

by Mateo Buenconsejo

Grade 2-Fortitude

One day, there is a caterpillar, and it’s name is John. 

John is happy looking at the butterflies flying from one flower to another. He wonders how he can become a butterfly.

He asks a butterfly, "How can I be like you?"

The butterfly says, "Easy! You just need to eat leaf."

And, John says," I don't like leaf. I only eat candy."

And butterfly says, "Never mind."

And John crawls away.

And John still eats candy.

One day, John thinks of eating a leaf.

And John eat a leaf.

And john says, "Wow that was tasty good.”

One day, John eats a lot of leaf, and he falls asleep.

One day, John turns to a butterfly.

And John wake up, and John looking at his body.

And John says, "Wow I look beautiful and I see my wings.”

And he fly fly to his friends.

The End

National Pancake Day

is our every Sunday breakfast as declared by Mateo. It can be an issue when there'd be another Sunday morning activity because he might miss his dose of pancake. 

But I think what he and the other 2 bebes really look forward to is the pancake syrup. @.@

If you happen to pass by our house on Sunday mornings, you might chance on our highly QA-ed pancake. Every piece is tasted by Mati after lifted off from the pan. @.@

Next #handjob: Final Gift?

I gave my nanay some crochet materials last Christmas (2014). From then, she had not stopped crocheting until around June when she was feeling weak. Then she was diagnosed with cancer this August.

When she learnt about it, one of the things she said that we should just go home (from the hospital), and she'd work on the blanket she promised Migi, which she started sometime in summer. She already made blankets for Meg and Mati. 

But every time she tried to start on the idea of crocheting again, it just did not happen. As I mentioned in my previous post, somehow cancer will take everything slowly away from you. To see it on a positive note, it is probably cancer's way to detach the person from the physical world.

To keep her from getting more frustrated, instead of telling her that she can make the blanket, I told her instead to not worry because I will take care of making the blanket for migi. 

I've been putting it off because, one, I find the pattern too difficult for my almost-beginner hooking skills. Second is that there's a book about hospice caregivers, "The Final Gift," which tells stories of people's final days. And people nearing death sometimes would like to give a gift before leaving. So I kind of keep on delaying making it. 

As much as I'm ready to let go of my nanay, there's just that... 

But now seeing her slowly being in more pain, making Migi's blanket might help. Maybe this is her final gift?

Pattern of this blanket available here http://www.redheart.com/free-patterns/lions-tigers-bears-blanket .

1 #handjob down

I can't believe my short attention span last this long to finish all these little squares. 

Honestly, i felt "kasukaon" after doing this. Thankfully, the litow boy volunteered to clean it up for me - cutting the extra strands of yarns dangling. He said he's like cutting grasses. :)

Let me bask in the glory of my first ever "big" #handjob I finished through and through.

I realized that it's a perfect "bilbil" cover. 

Downtown Cebu Foodie

I just find it weird that when you talk about one of the oldest restaurants in Cebu, it's called "Manila" Foodshoppe. It's not really part of my childhood memories because we're more of Snosheen(sp?) and Visayan restaurant whenever we got the chance to be in the city. But i'm not sure if these 2 restos still exist today. 

Lately, i frequent Colon / the downtown for the yarns (there's not much really variety / brands available but it's where i can find the cheapest). Colon always brings back childhood memories, and so to complete the nostalgia, I sometimes visit Manila Foodshoppe. I don't know if it was the oldest branch I visited; it has already the modern feels. :)

And when you're in Manila Foodshoppe, it's always the meatballs and their noodles for me. (I skipped the meatballs because 10pieces for 1 serving is too much.)

So it's the usual maki mi, and the siomai. The maki mi did not disappoint. 

I find Dimsum Break /harbour city's siomai much tastier but Manila Foodshoppe has bigger and shrimpier siomai.