Nov 23, 2015


Torn if i'm having PMS or simply bluer these days so i'm torn of putting down my thoughts, which are mostly on the darker shade which would just make me feel more spent, or just save it, and write it later as a book - i already asked a friend to make the book cover.
Torn between finding a work or sulking in the corner. Work for money and most of all to keep my mind occupied, but then i'm always torn between staying home and keeping an eye on my mother like a hawk or go out - how could i be functional at work like that.

On the brighter side kind of torn:

Torn among the restos in SM Consolacion, an attempt of Mark to let me get out and divert my attention to which I'm really thankful. It probably has not been easy for him but i'm too occupied to really care about the other people around me. Thinking about him and us, I don't know what kind of oddity we have not yet experienced. 

Torn between Myanmar and Vietnam. To make it less somber, i think of future trips, which may not necessarily be coming true. Vietnam for pho and coffee, but Bourdain's Myanmar feature showcased their interesting food and coffee culturw. 

Torn between Palawan and Baguio because going out of PH can be expensive. Baguio for the "diner" bucketlist. Palawan as an alternative for Vietnam. And just realized that I'd been to Palawan except that I have no beach photos that's why it felt I never been there.

Torn about getting a schooling on cargiving, nursing, PT/OT, and medicine. "Inspired" by my current situation, I'm kinda dead on becoming a specialist on "dying" industry. I have no prob studying for medicine but it just takes too long, nursing and caregiving can be so emotionally draining when caring for patients. So i'm Leaning on PT/OT because somehow there's a limit to the interaction/care i'd be providing. If all things fail, maybe a funeral parlor?

Owkei, i'm getting morbid. But weird that death, which is a very part of life, is always look at that way. 

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